Monthly Archives: May 2012

Could The Cubs Fans Be… Right???

I have several friends who for no explainable reason have spent their lives as Chicago Cubs fans. They are making my life worse than I ever imagined.

No Good Luck Goes Unpunished

For Cubs fans life is lived by the simple philosophy of Al Bundy, “No Good luck goes unpunished.” For the Cubs fan, it’s simply a given that no matter how well the first seven innings or first three games go, in the end there will be some easily foreseeable unforeseen disaster that will end the good times with an ever more devastating manner of dream crushing defeat. Face facts, the only reason the MLB 12 The Show commercial works at all is because it’s the Cubs who win the games’ player World Series – an event so unlikely even in a video game that you might as well save yourself the heartache and spend the money you would have spent on the game playing the Thai National Lottery.

In any case – and this is my point – my beloved Stockton Ports are NOT the Chicago Cubs. 

As recently as 2008 the Ports won the California League Championship, and late last season got on a late season run (including a 17 game winning streak) that saw them beat the Modesto Nuts in the first round and the hated San Jose Giants in the Division Championship series, before falling to the Lake Elsinore Storm in the League Championships (as a ToTaL aside, the Storm have been noted as having one of “the best” logos in MiLB, a theory with which I vehemently disagree, it’s just plain creepy).

“Best” or “Creepiest?”

Recently though, we have noted here that the Ports have suffered a bit of a downturn, including the interminable 17 game losing streak (and 20 out of 21) that seemed to find the team finding very Cubesque ways of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Once the streak ended, it seemed like things would get back on an even keel, a few roster moves were made by the organization and now it would all seem like a distant bad dream.

Until there were two outs in the 7th inning of a game against the Visalia Rawhide (who as another ToTaL aside DO have an awesome good tagline: “Roll Hide!”), with newly arrived Sean Murphy on the mound throwing not just a shutout, not just a no-hitter, but a perfect game (well, a no hitter after one out, anyway). 

With the wind howling through Banner Island Ballpark, a rip in the time-space continuum opened up and the BIB suddenly became Wrigley Field. Four errors and six runs later, it was all gone, like smoke in a mirror as if it had never been. 

And now Cubs fans think that this fully justifies their inflicting their own misery on me by comparing their own longsuffering ways with my temporary discomfort, which of course, it does not.

The nightmare of Cubs Fans

And I intend to keep on saying that until I start to believe it, without that little tiny cub of doubt running around my brain telling me that for the next 100 years it’s always going to be this way. 


Losing… It May Not Be Important, But It Does Suck


You may glory in a team triumphant, but you fall in love with a team in defeat. Losing after great striving is the story of man, who was born to sorrow, whose sweetest songs tell of saddest thought, and who, if he is a hero, does nothing in life as becomingly as leaving it.

Kahn, Roger (2011-02-22). The Boys of Summer (Kindle Locations 53-55). Harper Collins, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

wow.. baseball sucks right now.. and if you don’t know what it feels like to lose 13 out of 14 games please keep your comments to yourself

 – Ports Player Tweet

Losing sucks. In case you’ve missed it, my favorite minor league team, the Stockton Ports, have been mired in a nine game losing streak which has also seen them lose thirteen of the last fourteen games.

It’s not that the team is playing badly, they’re not. It’s just that the breaks that usually go in that 50-50 range to both teams are going 95-100 for the opponents this past two weeks. Line drives are “Atom Balls,” pop flies become doubles, a bizarre inside the park homer that had NEVER happened before in the history of the BIB, all the kinds of things that just have a team thrashing about in quicksand always wondering what will go wrong to make a 2-1 lead turn against them and become a 7-2 rout.

It’s irritating, grating, annoying, frustrating and generally makes me grumpy.  Which is why when my wife wanted to talk to me about some family stuff last night the conversation went like this:

Me: What?

Wife: What’s wrong?

Me: Nothing.

Wife: Then why are you so grumpy?

Me: It’s the Ports, they just can’t seem to buy a win right now

(very dramatic pause with that look – you know what I mean – the look)

Wife: Oh. So nothing really important, then?

She’s right, of course. A thousand miles away Daughter Number one is stressed about her wedding for which I am trying to lose another thirty pounds so I don’t have to rent a tuxedo, while daughter number two is ready to deliver our new granddaughter at literally any second now. Daughter number three is weeks from graduation, while daughter number four is wrapping up her sophomore year. Our twenty-two month old son just got his first haircut, and is still having issues with allergies and a rash. Two sister-in-laws are waiting for diagnoses this week of potential cancer cases, while my wife gets ready to travel that thousand miles to help as many of them as she can while enjoying her kids and grandkids. World events have everybody on edge while local news includes water rate increases and higher temperatures.

Yep. She’s right.

And losing still sucks.

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